23Apr
Nerdy Tech Jokes

We are a team of engineers and creatives that love to have fun while we work. As a result quite a few funny jokes have been shared over the years. Here are a few of our favorites!

1.

An SQL query goes into a bar, walks up to two tables and asks, “Can I join you?”

2.

Q: How many programmers does it take to change a light bulb?

A: None, that’s a hardware problem.

3.

A physicist, an engineer and a programmer were in a car driving over a steep alpine pass when the brakes failed. The car was getting faster and faster, they were struggling to get round the corners and once or twice only the feeble crash barrier saved them from crashing down the side of the mountain. They were sure they were all going to die, when suddenly they spotted an escape lane. They pulled into the escape lane, and came safely to a halt.

The physicist said “We need to model the friction in the brake pads and the resultant temperature rise, see if we can work out why they failed”.

The engineer said “I think I’ve got a few spanners in the back. I’ll take a look and see if I can work out what’s wrong”.

The programmer said “Why don’t we get going again and see if it’s reproducible?”

4.

[“hip”,”hip”]

(hip hip array!)

5.

random_number

6.

To understand what recursion is, you must first understand recursion.

7.

A guy is standing on the corner of the street smoking one cigarette after another.

A lady walking by notices him and says, “Hey, don’t you know that those things can kill you? I mean, didn’t you see the giant warning on the box?!”

“That’s OK” says the guy, puffing casually “I’m a computer programmer”.

“So? What’s that got to do with anything?”

“We don’t care about warnings. We only care about errors.”

8.

There are two types of people in this world.

Those that can extrapolate from incomplete data.

9.

These two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, “So what’ll it be?”

The first string says, “I think I’ll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy owmc63^Dz x.xvcu”

“Please excuse my friend,” the second string says, “He isn’t null-terminated.”

10.

Command line Russian roulette

[ $[ $RANDOM % 6 ] == 0 ] && rm -rf / || echo *Click*